What is Trauma?
Trauma is the body and mind’s response to something overwhelming—an event or series of events that feel like too much to cope with at the time. It might be:
- A one-time experience, such as an accident or natural disaster
- Repeated exposure to stressful or harmful situations
- Any moment that overwhelms your ability to feel safe or in control
What feels traumatic for one person may not feel the same for another. We all carry unique personalities, histories, attachments, and support systems. The age you were, who was involved, how people around you responded, and even how you saw yourself at the time—all shape how trauma lands in your system.
Remember: your experience is valid, simply because it is yours. There’s no right or wrong way to feel.response to it—is valid and uniquely yours. It’s important not to judge how you feel.
How Trauma Affects the Brain
When something traumatic happens, the brain does its best to protect you.
- The amygdala acts like an alarm system, capturing a vivid “snapshot” of the event.
- The hippocampus stores the memory, often with strong sensory details—what you saw, heard, smelt, or felt in your body.
Sometimes these memories get stuck, especially if the trauma happened in childhood when your brain and sense of self were still developing. Beliefs formed then can freeze in place, carried forward even into adulthood.
Because the subconscious doesn’t register the passage of time, your body may still react as though you’re unsafe—even when life around you is calm and secure.e passage of time, which is why you may still feel unsafe—even if you’re completely safe now.
“Why Can’t I Just Let It Go?”
This is a question many people ask. You may think: “But I had a good childhood” or “My parents did their best.”
Trauma isn’t always about extreme abuse or neglect. It’s about how something felt to you in the moment.
If there’s a memory from childhood that keeps resurfacing—one that still feels uncomfortable, even if others laugh about it—that may be your nervous system’s way of telling you it wasn’t safe. Your amygdala marked it as important for survival, and it stays alive in the background until it is processed.
These unprocessed memories can show up as:
- Anxiety
- Chronic stress
- Bursts of anger or irritation
All of these are nervous system responses to unresolved trauma.
Fight, Flight, Freeze (and Fawn)
We often hear about “fight or flight,” but trauma responses are broader than that:
- Freeze – shutting down, going numb, or disconnecting from feelings
- Repression – memories disappearing or feeling out of reach
- Delayed anger – reacting strongly later to something seemingly unrelated
- Fawning – people-pleasing to stay safe or avoid conflict
These responses are survival strategies. They’re the body’s way of keeping you going, even when emotions feel overwhelming.an appear in complex ways.
Common Symptoms of Trauma
Emotional and behavioural signs may include:
- Flashbacks or nightmares
- Hypervigilance (being easily startled)
- Mood swings or irritability
- Dissociation—zoning out, daydreaming, or feeling far away
- Struggles in relationships
- Low self-esteem or beliefs like “I’m not good enough”
You might also notice:
- Anxiety, depression, or PTSD
- Obsessive or compulsive behaviours
- Addictions or unhelpful coping patterns
Physical Symptoms of Trauma
Trauma doesn’t just live in the mind—it lives in the body too. It can show up as:
- Headaches or migraines
- Fatigue or low energy
- Frequent illness or infections
- Digestive issues such as IBS
- Chronic pain without a clear medical cause
Coping Mechanisms (and Why They’re Hard to Break)
When emotions feel unbearable, the mind often creates coping strategies to shield you. These can include:
- Alcohol or drug use
- Self-harm
- Overeating, undereating, or disordered eating
- Addictions such as gambling, shopping, or pornography
While these behaviours can bring temporary relief, they exist to help you avoid painful feelings. The difficulty is, they often add new layers of struggle on top of the original pain.
At the heart of it, coping strategies are not signs of weakness—they are signs of survival. They show just how hard your system has worked to protect you.
Trauma isn’t a life sentence. It’s a wound in the nervous system, and wounds can heal. With understanding, compassion, and support, the patterns that once kept you safe can soften, making space for new ways of being—ways that bring peace, connection, and self-trust.
How Trauma Counselling Can Help
I will hold a safe space for you to explore your feelings about how unsafe it feels to get something wrong and how small and insignificant you become for safety. That may take you back to a time when strict parenting was everywhere and so it felt like no one cared about your feelings. In the home with pressure and stress to perform or be invisible was the only thing you knew. There was nowhere for you to be you. Well in counselling you get to be validated, heard, fully understood and you can not get this wrong because you are the client and for once, it is all about you.
Are you ready to talk?
I offer a low-cost confidential service. I offer space to speak, find your voice, be really heard and validated. I am a trained professional counsellor who specialises in anxiety and trauma. Make an appointment to meet me and tell me what you want from counselling. See if you feel comfortable. The first session is over Zoom for both of our safety and then you can do sessions over Zoom from your own home or in person in mine, in my safe, comfortable therapy room.
Book your appointment today
Click here and book a free initial consultation with me today. Read what people are saying about working with me in counselling here. I hold a private, confidential space for you. I’m looking forward to meeting you and hearing you very soon. Best wishes, Karen.
Disclaimer: I am a UK qualified person centred counsellor specialising in anxiety and trauma within the context of counselling. I write from my experiences and from my client work in counselling. My work is dependent on the therapeutic relationship and the meeting of two minds. It is a humbling experience and that is all part of the healing process that I witness every day. It is the best job in the world. This is not an emergency service. If you need to speak to someone urgently outside of my sessions, please call the Samaritans on 116 123 (24/7 confidential helpline in the UK).
