(4 minutes reading time)
The real power lies in letting go. When you stop trying to control everything and everyone around you, life opens up in ways you never imagined.
Mel Robbins Let them theory
Were “Negative Emotions” Safely Expressed?
Think back to your childhood. Were you allowed to cry, be angry, or express sadness freely? Or were you told to stop being dramatic, calm down, or “be good”? Many of us grew up in environments where only certain emotions were acceptable—often the ones that kept things quiet, controlled, and predictable.
Was Anger Shamed, Suppressed, or Silenced?
Anger, especially, is one of the most misunderstood emotions. For many, expressing anger as a child led to consequences—being sent to your room, shamed, or ignored. Over time, we learn to push it down, pretend everything is okay, or redirect it inward in the form of self-criticism or physical symptoms. Living like this is exhausting. You may even begin to believe you’re not allowed to feel anything too deeply.
Did You Walk on Eggshells?
If you grew up in a household where conflict wasn’t resolved, or emotions were explosive and unpredictable, you might have learned to tiptoe around others. You monitored everyone’s mood. You became hyper-aware, overly responsible, or the “fixer.” This coping mechanism, while helpful as a child, often leads to burnout, people-pleasing, and disconnection from your own needs in adulthood.
Did Everyone Ignore Suffering in Silence?
In many families, emotional pain was invisible. People didn’t talk about their feelings. They powered through, kept smiling, and left no room for vulnerability. You might have sensed something was wrong but were never given the words or safety to explore it. When suffering is ignored, it doesn’t disappear—it just hides in the body, waiting to be acknowledged.
How Did That Impact You Growing Up?
Growing up in these emotional climates can leave deep imprints. You may struggle with anxiety, feel disconnected from your body, or constantly seek validation from others. It might be hard to say what you feel, or even know what you feel at all. You may feel guilty for wanting more—from yourself, from life, from your relationships. These patterns were learned, not chosen—and they can be unlearned too.
You deserve to have your feelings
Once a feeling is acknowledged and felt, it no longer needs to shout for attention. You begin to feel lighter, freer, and more at peace. You reconnect with your true self—the part of you that isn’t stuck in survival mode, but alive, open, and aligned. In counselling, you learn to trust yourself again, and your emotions become signals instead of burdens.
You don’t have to carry the emotional weight of your childhood forever. You deserve to feel safe in your body, clear in your emotions, and whole in who you are. Healing starts with giving yourself permission to feel.
How counselling can help
Together we will form a therapeutic relationship. I will provide you with a safe space to have your feelings. In person-centred counselling, there is no judgement. No right or wrong way to feel. You are offered a safe, compassionate space to experience your emotions—fully and without shame. When feelings are allowed into the body without analysis or suppression, something powerful happens: they move through you. They complete their cycle. They release.
Are you ready to talk?
I offer a low-cost confidential service. I offer space to speak, find your voice, be really heard and validated. I am a trained professional counsellor who specialises in anxiety and trauma. Make an appointment to meet me and tell me what you want from counselling. See if you feel comfortable. The first session is over Zoom for both of our safety and then you can do sessions over Zoom from your own home or in person in mine, in my safe, comfortable therapy room.
Book your appointment today
Click here and book a free initial consultation with me today. Read what people are saying about working with me in counselling here. I hold a private, confidential space for you. I’m looking forward to meeting you and hearing you very soon. Best wishes, Karen.
Disclaimer: I am a UK qualified person centred counsellor specialising in anxiety and trauma within the context of counselling. I write from my experiences and from my client work in counselling. My work is dependent on the therapeutic relationship and the meeting of two minds. It is a humbling experience and that is all part of the healing process that I witness every day. It is the best job in the world. This is not an emergency service. If you need to speak to someone urgently outside of my sessions, please call the Samaritans on 116 123 (24/7 confidential helpline in the UK).