Is the world is lying to us?
(5 minutes reading time)
You Are Not the Problem
If you’re in recovery or choosing not to drink, and you feel like the odd one out—you’re not. You’re not damaged, broken, or behind. You’re ahead. You’re awake. You’re doing what healthy humans do: facing truth, choosing presence, breaking cycles.
The shame you feel? That’s not yours. That was planted by a society that sold you alcohol as harmless fun, as connection, as reward. But it was never sold to us honestly. And you’re not the abnormal one for seeing through it. You’re just not asleep anymore.
The Real Dysfunction
Let’s be honest: the real dysfunction isn’t in recovery—it’s in the society that pushes a toxic substance into nearly every part of life. We’ve normalised drinking to the point where not drinking raises eyebrows. It’s at weddings and funerals, in celebrations and stress, at playdates and work functions.
We say it’s normal. But what’s normal about relying on a poison to cope, to connect, or to survive the day? What’s normal about a substance that damages every organ in the human body—including the brain—and yet is treated like food?
We don’t talk about that. Because if we did, we’d have to admit that the people we label as “addicts” or “in recovery” aren’t the dysfunctional ones. They’re just the ones being honest.
Recovery Is a Return to Truth
Sobriety isn’t a punishment. It’s not a lesser version of life. It’s not something you do because you can’t drink—it’s something you do because you finally won’t.
It’s a return to your natural state. A way of living that honours your mind, your body, your nervous system, your relationships. It’s clarity. It’s regulation. It’s presence.
You’re not living a restricted life. You’re living a free one. A fully functioning human life. And that is something to be deeply proud of.
The Cultural Illusion Is Breaking
Society set the standard. But society is just the majority—and the majority is shifting. More and more people are waking up to the truth about alcohol. They’re questioning what they were told. They’re noticing how it disconnects them from themselves and from others.
The illusion is breaking.
The idea that drinking is harmless, normal, and necessary is losing its grip. And the people in recovery? They’re leading the way. They’re not abnormal. They’re the evidence that healing is possible—even in a culture that still calls self-destruction a lifestyle.
Alcohol and the Generational Cost
We don’t just drink for ourselves—we drink around our children, too. We teach them that alcohol is how adults cope, how we celebrate, how we survive. But what they really learn is that presence is optional. That emotional availability has a limit.
Alcohol takes parents away from their children—not just physically, but emotionally. It turns connection into volatility, warmth into withdrawal, safety into unpredictability.
In recovery, that begins to shift. When you choose not to drink, you choose to be there. And when you’re truly there, your children feel it. That’s when the generational harm stops. That’s when healing becomes tradition instead of trauma.
Faith and False Permission
Even religion hasn’t escaped the confusion. We hear that Jesus drank wine, then we’re warned that drunkards won’t inherit the kingdom of heaven. Which is it? Is it sacred or sinful? Permitted or punished?
But maybe that’s the wrong question. Maybe it’s not about permission—it’s about truth. About whether a substance that disconnects us from God, from self, from others, really belongs at the centre of our lives. And maybe the most faithful thing we can do is stop pretending it does.
You’re Not Missing Out
If you’ve stopped drinking and wonder if you’re missing something—you’re not. You’re seeing what others can’t yet. You’re not suppressing joy—you’re finally able to feel it. You’re not giving up freedom—you’re reclaiming it.
What you’re missing out on is hangovers, emotional chaos, disconnection, shame spirals, broken trust, and the numbness that passes for peace. That’s not a loss. That’s a win.
Recovery Is Not a Secret to Hide—It’s a Truth to Live Out Loud
This world doesn’t need more people numbing their pain. It needs more people waking up. More people asking questions. More people daring to be different.
You are not the broken one. You are the functioning human in a dysfunctional world. And your life—your healing, your clarity, your presence—is the beginning of something better.
Imposter Syndrome in Recovery
If you’ve chosen sobriety but still feel like a fraud—as if you’re just pretending to have it together—you’re not alone. That’s imposter syndrome talking. It shows up when you’re doing something brave in a world that still calls it unusual. But there’s nothing fake about your healing. You’re not pretending to be better—you are better. You’re not on the outside of normal. You’re redefining it.
How counselling helps
Together we will form a therapeutic relationship and discuss where you are now and where you want to be (if you know yet). No matter what your relationship with alcohol is, we can explore the associations, the resistance and the struggles you have with either reducing or eliminating alcohol from your life. It is not as important as it seems and you can change your mind and your life. You will use new ways of coping. Alcohol will not be as relevant as it is now and you will feel better about yourself and your world will change. It might help to know that I see alcohol taking away childhoods and making people miserable. I want to help you find a way to live the life you want.
Are you ready to talk?
I offer a low-cost confidential service. I offer space to speak, find your voice, be really heard and validated. I am a trained professional counsellor who specialises in anxiety and trauma. Make an appointment to meet me and tell me what you want from counselling. See if you feel comfortable. The first session is over Zoom for both of our safety and then you can do sessions over Zoom from your own home or in person in mine, in my safe, comfortable therapy room.
Book your appointment today
Click here and book a free initial consultation with me today. Read what people are saying about working with me in counselling here. I hold a private, confidential space for you. I’m looking forward to meeting you and hearing you very soon. Best wishes, Karen.
Disclaimer: I am a UK qualified person centred counsellor specialising in anxiety and trauma within the context of counselling. I write from my experiences and from my client work in counselling. My work is dependent on the therapeutic relationship and the meeting of two minds. It is a humbling experience and that is all part of the healing process that I witness every day. It is the best job in the world. This is not an emergency service. If you need to speak to someone urgently outside of my sessions, please call the Samaritans on 116 123 (24/7 confidential helpline in the UK).